January 31, 2012
Dear Baby,
I just found out about you. I had my
suspicions for a while but today I took a test and two little pink
lines confirmed that you were indeed there. My first reaction was
shock. Quite honestly your daddy and I are still pretty young and we
didn't plan for you. I feel unprepared for everything that you will
bring into our lives, but I also feel something else. I feel so
blessed. I know that maybe our timing is a bit off but ultimately you
are an amazing miracle that I just can't wait to meet. Just knowing
that you are inside me right now just fills me with such a sense of
pride and joy that I can barely handle it! I already love you and I
already want whats best for you. I have started looking at all the
things I can't do while you're hanging out in my tummy and they are
all things I am thrilled to give up if it means you will be happy and
healthy! I know that this day marks the beginning of a long journey
that at times will be hard for both of us. I'm not gonna lie, the
idea of pushing you out of me it kinda freaking me out, but I know it
will be worthwhile. I know that I won't always be the perfect mommy.
I know that sometimes you won't like me and your daddy. Some days you
might think that we are just so annoying or that we make decisions
just to make your life harder, but I hope that over all of that, that
above all that you will know that we love you. That you are so
precious, even in these first few hours, even while I am still coping
with the idea of being your mommy, the first and foremost thought in
my mind is how I can do my best to help you grow up to be all that
you can be. I hope that you will always know that I will stand up for
you, stand behind you and stand in the way of any who try to harm
you. You are a gift from God little one. A gift that I am excited to
hold, excited to kiss, excited to hear and see and smell, excited to
snuggle and even excited to change. This is a crazy world you are
going to grow up in love, but as of right now you have a cheer squad
just waiting for you to show up. I guess what all my ramblings are
trying to say is that I love you. That’s what it will always come
down to. Please remember that no matter what.
From the bottom of heart,
Mommy
Its been a crazy ride so far, but I wouldn't change it for anything. I love my little family more than I can put into words and I am so thankful to God for how he works all things for good.
